There is something about a new year/fresh start that can trigger my automatic fear response.
My instincts are telling me to take it easy, to not make a decision until I’m sure.
If there is one thing that almost 10 years of having my own business has taught me it is that I’ll never be sure. Not ever.
There are so may lies in fear.
Unless I’m super clear about my next steps (and, honestly, even when I AM super clear) I feel the tension, overwhelm and inertia that signals me to pay attention to what I’m afraid of.
This time, there are a lot of thoughts about:
getting it wrong.
wasting my time.
going in the wrong direction.
not making progress.
putting in effort without seeing results.
Well. That’ll make you freeze and stop taking any action, won’t it?
One thing is sure though.
Let’s say I don’t take any action. Let’s say I allow myself to feel paralyzed, to be immobile, take the ‘safe route’ and just do what feels familiar and reduces my fear sensation.
Guess what I get then?
Not making progress.
So, the fear is a self-fulfilling prophecy, isn’t it?
What’s the solution then?
First, for me, I acknowledge the fact that I’m stuck in fear, that I’m feeling resistance.
Then, I breath.
There is a quote that says: Fear is excitement without breath.
So, particularly when I’m feeling fear, I also find that I’m not breathing very deeply.
I think carefully about fear, and if I can pinpoint the exact fear I’m feeling, I focus on that and breath as deeply as possible.
This slowly starts to shift the fear into excitement…
It shifts ‘what if I get it wrong?’ Into “What if I get it right?”
It shifts ‘what if I waste my time?’ Into “What if people find it helpful?”
It shifts ‘it feels like I’m going in the wrong direction?’ Into “At least I’m moving forward, and this is like a create your own adventure story – I decide what the wrong direction is, and I trust myself to know when I’m going there.”
Listen, I know this sounds far too simplistic, but I challenge you to give it a try. Since there is no real lion chasing me, I know that the fear I feel is actually a lie, and that means I get to change the story I tell about it.
Breathing deeply helps me do that.
Come on into The Distillery and let me know if you tried it, and how it works for you.